I learned the value of keeping one’s word through an experience that happened to Alyssa years ago.

A close relative promised her that she would be part of a very special ceremony however, when the time came, he wasn’t able to keep that promise. No one realized the hurt Alyssa felt, or how long she’d nursed that disappointment until she fell absolutely to pieces during one our “Friendly’s “ lunches. Once I found out about it, I had an obligation to her – to make sure that she was listened to and that we, the adults in her life, resolved the situation in an expedient and responsible manner.

Alyssa and I have often talked confidentially over the years; she understood our talks stayed confidential unless she told me something that I felt was harmful or hurtful to her. This particular situation warranted Parental intervention! I called my cousin (her Mother) to discuss what happened. She then understood Alyssa’s behavior about a totally unrelated issue involving this relative. I don’t know how the situation was resolved on their end however I know this relative and Alyssa remain very close.

We as colleagues and managers routinely make promises to each other. “That next promotion is yours”, “You’re going to manage that key account” or “I’m available to you whenever you need support”. We often don’t realize that promises we make have the same effect on our employees that the relative’s word had on Alyssa; expectations are set and disappointment may occur if the expectation isn’t met. If employees are disappointed enough times by unfulfilled promises trust begins to erode. Trust is fragile; what takes years to build can be dashed in a moment. Distrustful work environments often result in low employee morale and low employee engagement.

Develop an environment of trust in your workplace (keep in mind this is everyone’s responsibility, not just the job of your Human Resources (HR) department!). Be a person of your word with your peers, direct reports, clients and higher ups. When you are unable to keep your word, do the right thing and communicate to establish new expectations. Follow confidentiality policies with the understanding that any behavior or circumstances that are deemed harmful by HR or management will be investigated. Some people are still reeling from major disappointments suffered at their place of employment. Workplaces that offer avenues for employees to discuss their feelings constructively through one-on-one sessions with managers, mentors; focus groups, buddy systems or through Employee Assistance Programs are providing practical avenues for employers to listen, and when necessary, to act upon employee concerns.

If you have the opportunity to influence your company in a Human Resources or management function, try to be aware of the atmosphere in your workplace. You should be approachable to employees up and down the company ladder. Always speak to your employees’ intelligence because they know whether you can be trusted. Follow up to make sure any difficult situations are truly resolved. Your employees will appreciate you and the environment in your workplace will be more productive.

Lesson learned.